[Subject Change]*
You know those dreams where you realize you completely forgot to attend one of your classes all semester and now you have to go take the final? I don't. My mom said she still has that dream from time to time, but somehow I never had stressful test dreams. Until this summer. Go figure, I wait until after I graduate before I start having school nightmares.
Yeah, the Bar was that scary for me.
But the dreams never actually involved the test itself. It was always me, unable to get to the test (I had a very conscious fear of not getting there on time). I didn't have a pencil, and couldn't take the test.** Or we were trying to get pizza before the test and all the pizza places were closed. You know, weird stuff that makes sense in dreams and causes very real stress.
I didn't dream about the actual test until about 2 days beforehand. That one was terrible. I just kept writing essays I didn't know the answers to.*** I woke up and saw that it was like 3am, but I didn't want to go back to sleep if it meant that I had to dream about the next part of the test.
But the worst part is, I didn't start sleeping better when the test was over. I woke up a couple mornings ago in a panic. Oh my gosh, is the Bar today? Did I miss it? Can I still make it on time? That fleeting but intensely fearful sensation may have been worse than any of the dreams.
This post is getting boring and I'd like to be done reliving the Bar in any form.
Let's finish the way we started: HP.
*At one point, the above thought was connected to the below thought in my mind, but I no longer see the connection and am not going to attempt to make a smooth transition.
**This was obviously before I found out pencils were not even allowed.
***Although, maybe my dream wasn't quite as bad as one of my friends, who had a dream where he opened the cover of the test booklet and the first question was about Organic Chemistry. Talk about nightmares.
